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From Susan Merrill

The Blog

Encouragement

My Favorite Very Easy Valentine

You never know what day of the week Valentine’s will fall on. Often it is a school day. This recipe saves me no matter how busy the day because it only has 4 ingredients that are staples in my house. That means no preplanning on my part. All I need to do is make it the night before or get it in the oven before the kids get home from school. After a few years that yummy smell of flour, sugar and butter when they walk in the door will come to mean one thing to them – I love you! The other great thing about this recipe is its versatility. You can use a shortbread mold if you have one (easy to find them online for about $20) or use a pie plate or if your kids are into decorating make cut out cookies. Valentine Shortbread Recipe The Shortbread Mold Option: The Pie Plate Option: The Cookie Option:

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Marriage

Love is… Not Doing Well.

At least that is what a survey of young adults conducted by the Pew Research Center and Time Magazine says. A number of young adults were asked, “Is marriage becoming obsolete?” Nearly four out of ten survey respondents (39%) said that it is. TIME magazine posed this question to registered voters before, in 1978 and only 28% agreed. Apparently, young adults do not believe love is doing well in marriage. Ahh, this makes me sad. The romantic in me wants all true love to end in marriage. The mom in me wants my children to find that person who loves them, commit faithfully to them in marriage and of course, have babies! So I am very excited about a new campaign called LOVE IS… The campaign seeks to take a look at today’s culture and engage it in an understanding of what love is—whether you are dating or married. They offer a place where you can upload your love story, find love/marriage resources and engage in discussion about love. If you believe in love and marriage, get engaged in the LOVE IS campaign! Hmmm, I wonder if I am too old to upload my love story…my kids get kind of …

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Encouragement

A Good Looking Gadget that Makes Me Look Good

It’s…my slow cooker. Really! I am sharing about this product because I love it and this one really makes me look good. My husband got it for me at William Sonoma. It was a splurge (my whole Christmas present 2 years ago, and I didn’t even get the one with the stove top liner) but it was soooooo worth it. Here’s why: 1. I can cook at night while I sleep. 2. I can cook all day while I am at work. 3. It makes one dish meals – meat, veggies and more all in one pot. 4. It is easy to clean. 5. It is huge and makes enough for my big family or enough to freeze for another meal. 6. It makes my whole house smell good when I walk in from work. 7. It saves me time. 8. It makes great comfort food. 9. It makes me feel like superwoman because I am doing two things at one time! 10. It makes me look good to my family. They love to eat. Here are my favorite recipes… Chicken and Dumplings Pot Roast Spaghetti Sauce

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Parenting

Manners Mombligation

Yep, the reality is its your mombligation to teach manners. And with all the reality TV out there if you don’t teach manners you can be assured your child will not catch them from our culture. Am I being harsh? Remember this is just me (or my opinion) and it is my observation that much of reality TV is often focused on rude, mannerless people. You may have found a show or two that are paragon examples of civility but chances are those are not the shows that your children find entertaining! So you must teach manners (and limit reality TV). Manners are still important to your child’s future if you want them to find favor with their teachers and ultimately their employer. The earlier you start teaching manners the more your child will accept manners as a way of life. Here is a little song you can use as a manners reminder instead of nagging.

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Encouragement

On the Other Side of Surgery…

is a good place to be. That is where I am today. I am thankful. Not that yesterdays surgery was a terribly dangerous one but it was the 7th for this crazy heart. I have a faulty little gadget running this body. My heart, and its unpredictability, is a constant reminder to me of the tenuousness of my life. It is a good reminder. One that I need. It reminds me to really love those that I love. Every surgery forces me to review my life in case this is the end of my life. Every surgery is a run through of what I will be thinking about when my heart finally does go over the edge. When my heart first began misbehaving I was 17 and I had a cardiac arrest. In the moment that my life seemed suspended, my heart ached for people only. Not one vision of anything material. So I know from experience that when I do have that final moment my thoughts will not be filled with worry about work, bills, grades, or laundry. Nope, my thoughts will be only of people, only the ones I love.

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Parenting

Don’t Let Them Drive Away…

Unless they are ready. I have taught three children to drive. It is not my favorite thing to teach. Not because my kids weren’t good drivers. No, I don’t enjoy it because it is contrary to my every instinct, as a mom, to put my child in a dangerous situation. And driving is dangerous! But, it is a part of life and we can’t sweat it. But we can think about it real hard! So, I did. Here is what I came up with. 1. My kids have to be “A” students and have their priorities in order before receiving the freedom that comes with a license. 2. They must demonstrate an ability to exercise self-control especially when there may be peer pressure or distractions. 3. They must have earned my trust by handling other responsibilities with excellence. 4. They must sign this driving contract from iMOM.com. The contract makes it very clear what I expect of them as a driver. Then I let them drive away and I do the most important thing – I pray… Dear Lord, Please watch over my son. Do not let wisdom and understanding out of his sight, preserve his sound judgement and discretion; they …

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Encouragement

Where do I begin?

How about this? This is a really encouraging story. Last night I got one of those rare and precious gifts that become unimaginable as your children age. You know, when your kids are little you can count on at least one peanut butter and jelly kiss or hand crafted, crayon smudged love note a day, depending on how many kids you have. But when you hit those teen years, love notes are either not on their radar or otherwise directed! Back to the story. My teen, not going to say which one, wrote a paper and I found it. When I think that I might not have found the paper I could cry at the thought. I might never, ever imagined my child thought this way. Either way tears were in the making because this child thought about me deeply and that made me really cry. The point I want to make my dear, precious, fellow mom is that this is not just me. This paper is about you, too! Your children adore you even when you think they are not even aware you exist!

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Parenting

Can Your Child Be A Friend?

Of course! But it isn’t always easy. Every child needs a friend but not every child is good at making or keeping friends. My friend Lauren Dungy has a tender and passionate heart for teaching and reaching children. She lives this out with her own children as the mother of seven! Recently, she began putting precious lessons that her family has learned about loving others in print. Her new children’s book You Can Be a Friend is a beautifully and amazingly accurate picture of a lesson her children learned last year with a new neighbor. Below are two of the free downloadable tools that go with the book from Lauren.

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Parenting

Makeup for Girls 101

I was asked today how I handled makeup with my girls. Here are my thoughts: 1. Talk about it way before they want it. 2. Play together with makeup (emphasis on together). Girls like makeup. When you play, use soft pretty colors so they will start to see the beauty in a more natural look. Put the dark stuff away so it is not even a choice. 3. Praise their natural beauty so they develop confidence in themselves without makeup. 4. Train their artistic eye and taste in makeup. As they near the age when you will allow makeup, casually point out to them appropriate and inappropriate uses. Stay away from criticizing women you know. You can use magazine pictures. You can say things like, “That dark color makes this girl look angry.” Or, better yet, point out the positive uses of makeup around you, “See how that soft color on her eyes makes her eyes look huge without taking away from her face?” 5. Practice with a professional. All the department stores have makeup artists who will do your makeup for free. Find a good one by asking around or trying one out on your own. Make an appointment …

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Parenting

Tackling Tough Subjects

Tackling tough subjects really starts at age two. Let me explain, because I see this all the time. It’s cold and a two-year-old doesn’t want to wear a sweater. She pitches a fit and her mom gives in. Ten years later, the two-year-old is now twelve and doesn’t want to wear more than six inches of clothes. Mom wants her to wear more but the daughter pitches a fit. Chances are the daughter will win. “It’s just clothes,” you might say about the above. “How is that a tough subject?” Well, follow this progression: what she wears will determine the kind of dates she attracts. I consider dating a tough subject because who she dates will impact whether or not she has sex. And, well, I can go on and on about the consequences of that path. What to do? Three things… 1. Parent with the future in mind. Befriend women with older children or volunteer to teach Sunday school for teenagers. Be aware of what’s ahead. 2. Don’t give in when you know you are right. If you do, the child will think you really weren’t right in the first place, or else you wouldn’t have given in. Then they …

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