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From Susan Merrill

The Blog

Parenting

3 Questions to Ask to Find Your Purpose of Motherhood

I believe that visionary moms are guided by core values and a sense of purpose beyond just worldly success. Their deeply held core ideology gives their families a strong sense of identity and a thread of continuity that holds them together in the face of change and even trials and tribulations. If a mom wants to drive for progress in her parenting, she needs to know her purpose and how to hit that clearly defined target that she is shooting for. {Tweet} What is it that you want? What is your goal? Define it and you will have your purpose for parenting. {Tweet} To help us find our purpose, we need to answer these 3 questions: What are your core beliefs? What is your goal for your children? What is your purpose as a mother, and how will you work it to reach your goal? Every mom will answer these questions differently. And that is what makes life so exciting. We are all unique, with unique perspectives, unique children, and unique opportunities. My core values and goal are only examples for you. This is how I answered: 1. What are your core beliefs? My core belief is a belief in …

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Parenting

Tips For Helping Your Child Get a Summer Job

It is not easy to find those summer jobs. My kids have had lots of different jobs including babysitting, coaching swimming, JCrew sales associate, Publix bag boy, Chick fil A counter server, Kanakuk Camp Counselor, appliance delivery boy and construction worker. My oldest also had two different summer internships, one with Chick Fil A Corporate and one with NBC. Whether your child finds a job or not this summer, the process itself is a lesson worth learning. It will teach your child to value a job if they get one, how to apply, how to confidently approach a manager, and what to expect in an interview. Here are 10 tips for helping your child find a summer job! (click to tweet) Start early because everyone else will be looking for a summer job, too. Use your contacts. Knowing someone will greatly increase your child’s chances. Know that many large corporations such as JCrew require employees to be 18 or older. But when your child is old enough these jobs can have a benefit. Merchandisers often employ “seasonal” associates on holiday breaks when they return home from college. This has been very convenient for my daughter who always has an …

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Parenting

It’s Never Too Late to Bond With Your Teen

Last summer we lost Gidget, the only dog my children have ever known. She died like she lived always trying to please all of us. She waited for Megan and Grant to get home and with the whole family gathered around her, we watched her leave. It was the sweetest thing, we loved her so and she so faithfully loved us. None of us could stand it. Something was missing in our home. But, Mark, refused to allow us to get another dog. He wouldn’t even talk about it. We were traveling more with two children grown, two away at school and only one left at home. We needed to be free to travel. For Marky and I it was tough to be home without Gidget. It all started innocently enough, just a little after school dog browsing on the internet. Then one day we impulsively decided to take a drive up to the Humane Society. We went back the next week. The puppies all went fast it seemed. The next week we met Katie and we knew we would have to act fast. Marky bought her. Mark was already home from work when we pulled in the drive. …

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Parenting

Pray or Panic? What Do You Do?

Confession… My go-to answer is panic, not prayer. In a tough situation, I’ll have a good cry, but then, as the tears subside, my mind takes off as if it’s in a NASCAR race, around and around and around, but not in a good way. (click to tweet) Every circle around the track is a different scenario of the situation, in a thousand shades of depressing gray. I overreact in fear. Fear, worry, anxiety and panic are not the solution, but prayer is. Prayer is the only guaranteed panic prevention. It is OK to have a good cry, but we can’t allow that grief and concern to convert to fear. We must cap off the panic and download all our passion into fervent prayer. (click to tweet) It is not easy to choose to be still in prayer and resist spinning into action of some sort. It is still hard for me. My friend, Jodie Berndt’s books below really helped me to learn to pray proactively. These Passionate Mom printables (click on the printable) are less detailed than Jodie’s books but will get you started on your way to being …

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Parenting

The Parenting Roller Coaster

An excerpt from The Passionate Mom: Life comes with problems, and so do children. There will always be struggles and opposition to your efforts, days and even weeks when you just can’t seem to get ahead of the onslaught. Little children have little problems, and bigger children can have bigger problems. All five of my children are within six years of one another—I know it’s crazy, but I never planned to adopt two children the same ages as two of my biological children. Then they grew, and I had five teenagers all at one time…

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Parenting

What Is Your Real Passion?

An excerpt from The Passionate Mom Chapter 7 – Purpose Passion + Purpose = A Plan These three—passion, purpose, and planning—have a special relationship and, it starts with passion. Without passion you won’t have the drive to develop a purpose, and if you don’t ever find a purpose, you surely won’t see the need to have a plan. …

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Parenting

Passion Takes Action With Initiative

Passion Takes Action–an excerpt from The Passionate Mom Nehemiah’s people were in trouble, and it is clear he felt passionately about it. There is nothing amazing in that. When our children are in trouble, we can be just as passionate. What is amazing and an inspiration to me is what Nehemiah did with his passion. He did not allow himself to be permanently overwhelmed. He did not freeze in fear…

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Parenting

Loving Your Child Will Challenge You

If you choose to zero in on your child’s life—to really try to train your child “in the way he should go”—you will need passion (Prov. 22:6). It won’t be easy because passionate love does not allow us to back away from difficult tasks; it pushes us to take on challenges that are out of our comfort zones. And when that happens—when you have to do something beyond what you know you can do—that is when you learn to pray, believing that God can do the amazing task of raising children through you. An excerpt from The Passionate Mom

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Encouragement

The Parenting Problem: Fear, Worry, Anxiety, Panic

Do you ever have that nagging feeling in your gut that something is not right? Has it become a constant companion so familiar to you that you don’t know what life without it was like? Are you parenting in fear? Most of my worries follow a little pattern that includes the surprising ability to spiral out of control without me even noticing. The feeling springs up as a little pang of fear in my gut; it then grows, picking up speed, swirling into my brain and filling it with worry; then it sucks me into a funnel of anxiety, till I bottom out in a puddle of panic. When I land, I am a mess— depleted, confused, and useless. The circle of fear-worry-anxiety-panic is a circle that most moms have experience with. We love our children and it is natural to fear for them. But it is not healthy to make parenting in fear a habit. A mom must learn to leave the circle of fear and find peace in parenting. Accomplishing this requires awareness of how and when and why you fall into the circle.

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Marriage

Be Thankful You Have A Partner In Parenting

There are times when we would all like to throw our spouse overboard. But no matter how imperfect your spouse is as a parent, most single moms (and dads) would tell you to appreciate the fact that you have help and support in the parenting game. After listening to lots of single parents and the challenges they face, I realize it’s a great privilege to have someone to tag-team with when parenting is overwhelming! Being partners in parenting is actually a wonderful thing. So here are some things you might have overlooked in your co-parent that you can be thankful for…

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